For 23 years, I have had a family that has been with me through a lot and although I have put them through a lot of crap, they continue to stick by me. I continue to ask why they stick around, or is it why do I? The only answer I can come up with is that I love them very much. I have always taken them in and my doors will be open to them just as my own family has opened their door to me many times when I needed it. I have had to keep shut the doors on a couple of the older ones for reasons I prefer not to disclose. As time went by I had to reopen those doors just as my own family did for me. I have a family that will stay at my side when I need them even though I have put them through a lot.
However the one that was with me the most was my best friend and wife Pam, and for those who have a fear of Friday the 13th, I have to say unless you have had trouble with that day, I wont believe all the myths about that day. My wife of 22 years on May 13th which YES is a Friday, the same day we got married on. The only problems I had was a small partial complex seizure and my pants ripped in the crotch after the marriage was over that was all that happened. Cause for the seizure, Anxiety and ripped pants was due to trying to pick up my the youngest so we could get about our day. We have had some very serious problems some of which could have separated us. Which some would have said it was because of their marriage date or blamed each other. However I blame myself for my end, I don’t blame anyone for my mistakes. My first surgery on 7-8-2008 wasn’t as strenuous as the second because it was done in downtown Grand Rapids not to far from where I lived and I was 7 days away from being 36 years old . So my family could see me after the surgery was done. Sure there was a lot of them who didn’t like my decision and where extremely afraid that I wouldn’t make it home. But as you can see I did.
The second was even harder for all of them. Because it was done in Ann Arbor Mi, which is a distance from my home and getting there to visit wasn’t as easy, however I couldn’t go by myself. So over a period of a maybe a year, I had a lot of testing and before my surgery I had to take some extra trips down to University Of MI., for some testing which also included a implant of electrodes on the brain itself to pinpoint the actual spot in which the disorder was originating from. In the mean time during this time of testing I had to take different people down for doctors appointments, tests, and finally the surgery. Again the surgery many of my family was scared that I wasn’t going to make it back home not only were they messing with the brain, but now I was another 7 years older. During the last surgery, on 12-16-2015 at the age of 43, there where numerous reasons for their fears, some their own, some had the same.
Myself, I had a small fear that I wouldn’t make it off the table as well, however I also had enough Faith that I had made it through one surgery I would make it through another I had so much Faith that I was also hoping that my wife would take my word that she wouldn’t worry as much as she did, and the doubt that it wouldn’t work. Now my daughter-in-law kept my wife informed throughout the whole thing that the only thing she wasn’t told was the the night we came home, however I had informed my son because I knew we had to tell someone and I knew he could keep a secret. Even though he paced as it got closer to the time for us to get home he was able to pull it off, especially when we got into Grand Rapids, he awaited for our call to let him know we where in town. When his wife called to let him know we were a mile from home she asked if he could come down and help me get home because I was still in a state of confusion the instability I was in due to the surgery just two days prior and stress that I felt his wife was in I felt that she could use the extra help. He then again had to play it off by telling his mom (My wife), that he had to go clear his head. Well after we got back to the house he came back in the door, I believe I came in and the tears just began to roll down her face considering I wasn’t supposed to be home for atleast another 3 days. I love playing little tricks on her, I think it is funny at times, she thinks sometimes it is cruel but she also knows how I am because of how I was raised and I had not only learned from the best but also the first time I met her I had a few words, that she even told me later as time went by that she thought the day we met I was crude and rude. Now as for how I got released early, The hospital had gotten so packed that they were going make me share a room with another patient, and that also meant my daughter-in-law would have to sleep in the waiting room which was also packed. Now the headaches I was getting alone was enough for me to talk to the surgeon into letting me go home early, he in returned told me he was going to talk to the EP team and see if that was possible, he soon came back and told me that I could. After a few changes with our transportation a call to my son we were able to head home.
A few days later I also had told my wife that I felt that if I hadn’t made it of the table it wouldn’t matter to me as well. Now I have told others as well. Now with that being said my family still sticks by me. There are times that due to both surgeries I have lost a lot of my years and even worse yet a lot of my more recent memory is also gone. Sometimes I will tell everyone to leave me alone because this is so bothersome to me that I try to figure some things out. There are also times I will sit at the table and chuckle for no reason at all.
The biggest and irritating problem for me is since then I have been sleeping way to much. It drives me crazy at times because it brings me back to the first 14 months of my youngest sons life when I worked such long hours that I missed so much of that time period.
Now if I can get married on Friday the 13th live through 2 brain surgeries, getting hit 4 times in the same leg and spot with no broken bones at all different ages some worse than others. Two of them I got up and walked away, sending the person who hit me on their way as well with out calling the police and having a family that stuck by me for many years of seizures, Two different times in my life being in a coma for a week at a time on both occasions and loosing lots of important days such as New Years Parties Birthdays’ and other parties. For that matter during this last round of tests I missed my wife and grand-daughters’ last birthday’s due to tests. Now if that tells you I don’t believe the myths then I don’t know what will.