Drivers Seat

As I return to blogging after the in ability to find the words to say.
The first post I came across was a post about how people didn’t listen from the beginning of time instead they wait until things have gotten to the point of damage, and how people don’t want to get involved until it’s to that point, where it is hard for a person to change and let God take the Drivers Seat. The ability for a person to do this is so hard that it is almost impossible.

Drivers Seat

Gods plan for everyone is to allow problems to come into their lives the problem is people have top be ready for them, how to deal with them, and ultimately remind people that the devil is looking for souls to consume before that person can  see him coming and counter attack  with the knowledge of Gods Word. Even though I say this I have been through some of the roughest of life, and it not only has given me the inability to allow others to penetrate. and soften my soul even God himself. I will not allow the devil to attack my soul without a fight.

Reminds me of trying to give your Children advice before they reach adulthood, before it’s too late. They run into trouble then look at you and say, ” I should have listened to you, I wouldn’t be in this mess now. But as a parent all you can do is say we’ll help you out this time and hopefully you learned from your mistake.

I am one of those people who has a big problem.
Allowing others to take control of my life is extremely hard for me.
As I grew up, there was many situations that had a major part in this inability of allowing this situation.

1. As I was a child I would go to church on Sunday morning leaving an hour early, just to make sure I wasn’t home when my biological father got home because I always got physical beat for reasons that was not my fault. Due to this, I was put in numerous foster homes, causing mixed emotions and a messed up outlook about God, due to if the foster parents did go to church not one of them went to the same denomination causing confusion because of the different aspects and the way they taught the Word of God.

Then as I got older and began going to church on my own with my second wife, it got to the point where it was again as I felt being forced on me because she wanted to go twice on Sunday, and again on Wednesday, all this was after becoming a  member of the church we were going to. While going to this church after becoming a member we received a box of envelopes with a member ID number. Even though we didn’t put our Tithe in the envelopes we still Tithed.
Now within about six months we received a letter letting us know that we were being dropped from membership. That’s when I figured out that they had looked at us as just a number not as a person with a name but a number because we didn’t use the envelopes provided for our Tithe.

Then the second Church we became members to we were fine until it came to the point where we then moved to our current location. Due to my wife’s health and myself being unable to drive, we had been unable to attend on a regular basis as well. Now with this church being a very small one they were able to tell if we were there or not. Due to the fact we also had a couple parishioners that had to pass our house I had called them to see if one of them could stop by and pick me up on their way through. Well of course soon we received another letter from this church stating that we were being dropped from membership not because we weren’t Tithing but because they felt that remolding our home was more important then attending church.

Back to the main subject:
As I sat here earlier talking to my son another fellow blogger we were talking about the same things I had just mentioned her in the post as the conversation started with the same subject that this post started. Allowing God to take the driver seat. I have had this talk with him on numerous occasions, and in some ways he understands my point, but he still talks to my about allowing God to break this brick wall that has built up around my heart due to all the turmoil that I have gone through as a child.

Many times I can feel the pain of not allowing God to take the control of my life, however it seems that once I start to allow Him to take control something bad happens, which makes me take back the drivers seat. I know it disturbs him, and me as well because sometimes we spend up to a half hour discussing things like this and then, the same thing happens all over again where we end up having the same conversation a few days later. Even though we are having this discussion on at least a monthly basis, I know what he went through as a child so it not only helps me to talk to him but myself. It also help him to talk to me. In a way it is a win win situation for the both of us until, something happens. My problem is when something goes wrong I look at it as God had a reason, not that I might have been the cause for that, such as I didn’t listen and let God take control of the drivers seat.


6 thoughts on “Drivers Seat

  1. Pingback: Being A Christian Isn’t Easy – Soulja 4 Christ Ministry

  2. Hi Dad, I wanted to chime in and say that the devil knows your weakness and as you stated

    however it seems that once I start to allow Him to take control something bad happens, which makes me take back the drivers seat.

    The devil doesn’t want you to follow God, so yes he will stir something bad for you to encounter, but more importantly God’ is allowing it to happen for a reason. The Lord wants you to learn how to lean on him, especially when things are out of our control. We cannot control the hurt that others give but we can make the choice how we’re going to handle that hurt as example if it’s going to be another brick in the wall or if we are going to allow God the opportunity to handle our circumstances. Yes i know how hard it is to let go, but why hold onto the pain when the other party has moved forward and most likely forgot about the hurtful words or circumstance.

    I recently wrote a post about vulnerability and how I would avoid feeling that way and as the Lord has showed me, is that I need to be okay with feeling that way at times and trust that He (God) has my back. The bible teaches us in our weakness He is strong. I know to some this sounds bad but I promise it’s not I use to look at as it was, but I have learned to see it through God’s eye’s which is a shelter to run to when I need rest because I’m weary.

    You have to make a choice and stick with it dad, because your soul is at stake which is more important than holding onto past pain.

    Love your son, Teck.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. There was much turmoil in your life that caused trauma to your soul. The distrust comes from all the wounds and the enemy of our soul uses it to torment. Forgive and release the churches and the people in them. Speak out loud: I release the trauma from my soul, as an act of my will and tell it to leave and not to come back. I bind the healing love of God, his light, life and grace to my soul, as an act of my will. Jesus said, “And truly I say to you, everything whatsoever you will bind in the earth will have been bound in Heaven, and anything that you will release in the earth will have been released in Heaven.” (Matthew 18:18) We speak life or death with our mouth and it is powerful. If you do this, the trauma will go. God loves you and Jesus purchased your freedom.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. Your post says a lot about the things you’ve been through.
    But one thing is everything our human hands touch goes to ruins within a short period if we don’t have a powerful hand supporting us.
    Sometimes the things we have been through causes us to be very independent, not calling for help even when we desperately need it.
    Another thing is strongholds are built in our lives at a very early stage therefore its roots go deeper than when we grow it takes serious battles to get out ofcourse with the help of God.
    So the fact that sometimes you want to allow God to take charge and you realize that as you try things get out of hands means that the enemy does not want you turning to God.
    Secondly, things don’t go well because your Faith in the One you asking for help from isn’t that strong to stand the test you are going through.
    So in other the things to work perfectly it must be a total surrender to God. Trust in Him fully that you know that I matter what happens, in the end victory will be yours.
    God bless you for sharing this🙏

    Liked by 3 people

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